Van Ree's Voice

It didn’t take me long to realize that Sidney is a city of cliques. I’m not saying that as a bad thing by any means, but the younger crowd surely has divided themselves into groups of friends.

Sometimes these groups cross into one another, but for the most part they disassociate. I tend to think the older crowd accepts everyone, as in most places, but you can also tell who likes someone and who doesn’t.

I guess I was sort of a loner in the works, but unlike most, I was blessed to find a group of friends who were locals right off the bat.

But from the standpoint of a girl new to Sidney and an “outsider” looking in, I notice things that some born and raised here might miss, having lived within the scene their whole lives.

Apart from the stark stares I tend to get from people most every time I enter an establishment, whether it be a local business or a local nightlife entertainment establishment, I tend to think I could fit in in Sidney, Neb.

But I have a problem joining a clique to do so. I’ve always been a floater in all social groups at my high school, college and community. I tend to think I don’t have a problem with any social group, be it “hicks”, “nerds”, “jocks”, “goths”, “religious” or any other, and that they don’t have a problem with me.

It seems to me that although the social groups in Sidney are segregated, they are all way more similar then they think.

I’m use to the Westside of the country, Seattle, Olympia, Portland, Sacramento and San Diego, to name some of the bigger cities.

In these places there are social cliques but they are massive groups, not just a group of five friends or so found in the Sidney setting.

They however, are more extreme.

If you are exceedingly into piercings, you are immediately friends with and accepting of all other people that like the same thing, no matter how they live, where they are from – that connection creates a bond.

Just like a fraternity or sorority bond, these bonds are visible and plain.

Here I wouldn’t know who was in whose clique unless they are in a group together in a restaurant-type setting.

Where I am from no one hides who they are. You plainly know what every one is like, their interests, their backgrounds and you accept them for being different.

This article might make some people angry, and some might think that I am bothered by the undefined cliques that I’ve found so far make up this town. I am not.

I am simply explaining the differences I have seen in geographical locations throughout the country and explaining how new this atmosphere is to me.

I’ve noticed in the Midwest that it almost seems like everyone wants to be portrayed as having the white-picket fence, the amazing all-around American kids and the high paying job.

While there is nothing at all wrong with this, people at my school used to make fun of my family and how the four of us appeared to be the “perfect white-picket fence, all-American family,” as I stated above.

We are far from being perfect, like any family, but I was actually made fun of for the bones I didn’t have in my closet, for not having apparent flaws and for not being different.

I just find it funny that back home I was made fun of being what a lot of people I’ve met here want.

I found my own way, however, whatever that means, and once I opened up to people they realized I made jokes, just like they did, I loved books and sports, just like them, and I made mistakes – countless mistakes on a daily basis.

Once I opened up about my life and who I was people realized I had no “social home.” I was nice to them and they were nice to me. I might not have worn Carhartts every day and drove big diesel trucks but I respected them for who they were and they respected me.

I’m not saying I haven’t fallen into a clique since I’ve been in Sidney, and I’m not saying that in Sidney everyone strives to portray themselves as perfect. I am just saying in the Midwest people seem to quiet their differences while on the Westside of the country you are known for them.

I like to think that I have fallen into the clique that accepts me, while most others do not. I fell in with a local born and raised crowd and fell out of touch with the other newcomers like me. I accept it with gratitude because I wouldn’t change my friends now for the world. However, I do wish more groups would blend.

Like I said before it is hard for me to tell who is in what clique unless I see them with each other continually.

Everyone is nice to each other when they are by themselves and see a member of the other clique but the exchanges seem to be usually short-lived.

But when I meet with someone one-on-one, which I do from time-to-time with my job, most of ya’ll are the same.

You have the same feelings on issues, like the same things and it all boils down to a love of the small town you are in. The honor that most of you carry with living here is great and I have yet to see that conjoining feeling falter.

I’m not trying to say that everyone should go out of their way to be friends with each other, or that things should change at all.

But there is no harm in not judging a person you don’t know, and there is certainly no harm in getting to know them before you decide they aren’t worthy of your friendship - which could turn out to be great.

My father once told me that although people in the Midwest might be the most conserved at first, they seem to have the deepest, lifelong friendships with people once the connection is made.

Hannah Van Ree can be contacted at [email protected].